AO: Abduction

When: 05/16/2020


Number of Pax: 5

Pax Names: Ditka, Ellie Mae, Googan, Paul Blart, Short Circuit,

Number of FNGS: 1

FNG Names: Paul Blart

QIC: Short Circuit

The BackBlast:


Ain’t nothing like working out at the F3 Fort Collins #motherShip.  It’s something YHC looks forward to all week long.  And so when Ellie Mae pulls up pre-beatdown, YHC has a partner-in-crime for some EC ruckin’, circling back to find one FNG (Geoff Harris) ready for a solid thrashing.  After disclaimer was disclaimed, the PAX needed some invigoration with their “aye” responses.  YHC dispensed 5 burpees (OYO) to open up the lungs and make sure we were all on the same page; after that, we took off toward FCHS (sprinting up the hill) for some…


  • SSH x 20 (IC)
  • String Rippers x 15 (IC)
  • CH Squats x 15 (IC)
  • Merkins x 15 (IC)
  • Don Quixotes x 10 (IC)

The Thang:

Part 1: The #Steinl

Not content to leave well enough alone, YHC dished out (just a pinch of) the Steinl

  • Plank (30s)
  • Chillcut Plank (30s)
  • Merkins x 10 (IC)
  • Amazing Spiderman x 10 (IC)
  • Merkins x 10 (IC)

We only made it through one round*, and the amount of #midwifeNoises was STRONG.  We finished and ran over to the playground for…

Part 2: Blimps Mountain

The concept is simple: six stations.  Start at the parking lot, and run to the first station and back, second station and back, etc.  Each time you get to the parking lot, do 5 Irkins.  However, the stations had a catch…

  • Station 1: 5 Burpees
  • Station 2: 5 Burpees, 10 Lunges
  • Station 3: 5 Burpees, 10 Lunges, 15 Imperial Walkers
  • Station 4: 5 Burpees, 10 Lunges, 15 Imperial Walkers, 20 Merkins
  • Station 5: 5 Burpees, 10 Lunges, 15 Imperial Walkers, 20 Merkins, 25 Plankjacks
  • Station 6: 5 Burpees, 10 Lunges, 15 Imperial Walkers, 20 Merkins, 25 Plankjacks, 30 Squats

After we made it UP the mountain, I had the unfortunate displeasure of having to tell the PAX, we now had to make it back down**.

We started working our way back DOWN the mountain, when YHC called Omaha, and we converged on the #shovelFlag for…


  • LBCs x 20 (IC)
  • Low Dolly x 15 (IC)
  • LSF x 15 (IC)
  • Heels to Heaven x 10 (IC)
  • American Hammer (LET FREEDOM RING!) x 10 (IC)


  • Happy to have FNG Geoff Harris out with us this morning (F3 Paul Blart);  We’re glad you made the drive from Greeley to come join us brother.  We’re better because of you, and hopefully you’re better because of us.  Keep coming back.  Aye!
  • Thoughts and prayers for Go Blue!  His M had their 2.2 early, and although they’ve had a few difficulties, baby seems to be heading towards health, and family is doing well.

YHC took us out.

Naked Man Moleskin:

  • * It was quite funny afterwards when Ditka mentioned that he was wondering when (during the Steinl) YHC was going to call for a “recover”, but never did.
  • ** Additionally, Ditka mentioned he was slightly heartbroken when he went through the hard work of making it UP the mountain, only to be told he would now have to work his way back DOWN.

Men – it was an honor to lead and serve you this morning.  Don’t be afraid to belt out that count, or a solid “Aye!”  We’re men – be assertive, not aggressive, and step hard to that mic when called upon.

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